today’s vegetable

I know I write about Xiu Xiu too much. I promise this is the last time I’ll hammer on about their new record, Dear God, I Hate Myself. But Jamie and company have made something really wonderful in this album. The review that I was working on for this blog turned into the onesheet for the record, so I never posted it. But with the album coming out next week on my favorite label, Kill Rock Stars — well I just thought I’d post everything here.

You can preorder Dear God from KRS here, or get it from iTunes right now.

And it’s a safe bet that if I had posted this here originally it would have contained more swear words.

Read almost any piece about Xiu Xiu and you’ll see words like ‘harsh’ or ‘brutal’ — the same words that appear before ‘truth’ when an unwavering eye is turned on any intimate detail of our lives. Fair descriptions of the themes central to the music, they sit incongruous to the refined, intricate, and beautiful approach taken in crafting the twelve tracks on Xiu Xiu‘s new album Dear God, I Hate Myself.

The two biggest constants throughout Xiu Xiu‘s catalog are honesty and evolution. This remains true with Dear God, I Hate Myself as it delivers a look at responsibility, fear, healing, and societal roles wrapped in rich gothic pop music. The sound is still distinctly Xiu Xiu, but Jamie Stewart‘s vocals are effortless paired with vibrant melodies full of subtlety and the distinct sonic accents expected of this anticipated Xiu Xiu release. The result is a record that proves that art can be pop and pop can challenge you to look inside yourself.

Stewart is joined by new full-time band member Angela Seo on piano, synth, and drum programming; with production handled by Jamie and Deerhoof‘s Greg Saunier. Together they’ve crafted a fully grown sound for Dear God, I Hate Myself with elements from goth and pop that are expertly performed by a crop of brilliant musicians. Saunier himself plays on much of the record as does Ches Smith (John Zorn, Terry Riley, Marc Ribot) who supplies timpani, conga and moog along with a broad range of other instrumentation. Deerhoof‘s John Dieterich is all over a rendition of the traditional folk song “Cumberland Gap” and Xiu Xiu is even joined by the Immaculata Catholic School Orchestra in Stewart‘s ode to heartbreak and healing, “This Too Shall Pass Away (for Freddy).” The title track, one of four songs done primarily on a Nintendo DS, explores the relationship between faith and despair with a layer of commentary provided by the bizarre sounds of the music itself.

Each new Xiu Xiu release has evolved alongside the lives of Jamie Stewart and company. On this record you’ll find more intensity and introspection than ever before, but sonically and lyrically it continues to move forward with a subtly new perspective — hyper-focussed yet aware of a larger, external picture unfolding. The pace of the record grips you, the music offers layers of detail, and the themes focus on not just the past or stark present but hint towards vespers of the future as well. Dear God, I Hate Myself will challenge you and force you to look inside yourself, but only after you get lost in the music. It’s passionate, it’s energetic, and it affects you.

Dear God, I Hate Myself is a beautiful piece of humanist art. It’s an important addition to the growing body of intelligent music from Xiu Xiu. And it’s a brilliant gothic pop record that can stand next to anything.

This is really a draft post that I had started writing the night before Clementine was born. Now six weeks later it’s been sitting here taunting me. Rather than try to pick up the moment and go I’m just posting the in-progress piece.

I’ve since picked it apart and transformed it into a more clinical onesheet for Xiu Xiu’s (amazing) upcoming release, Dear God, I Hate Myself. I’ll post that here sometime too, but I think this has more warmth, and speaks to that special bit inside of Jamie’s music that I’m always ranting about to friends and anyone who’ll listen…

Xiu Xiu is the reason I work so hard. Xiu Xiu makes me feel, makes me listen, helps me understand. Xiu Xiu inspires me to keep pushing through the lean times, to build something for the greater good, to do what little I can to help nurture the art that supports me. I could never pick a favorite artist, but without doubt Xiu Xiu is the most important band in my world.

Xiu Xiu revolves around Jamie Stewart and in song he covers topics headier than most would ever touch, ranging from abuse and sexuality to finding happiness and ethical dilemmas of a grandiose scale. All at once the music is philosophy, self-portrait, exploration, and bare honesty — but art above all else.

Most people that talk about Xiu Xiu start similarly, and end up speaking to the bravery of Jamie to deal with such hard issues, or they tell their own stories of pain and healing through the music he makes. Those stories are touching, they’re a perfect reaction to the art he creates, and I think they speak to the core of why people can embrace Xiu Xiu so wholeheartedly. They’re good stories, and work well in context.

But no. I don’t want to share my pain, it’s my own. And I don’t want to talk about what the music makes me feel, because that’s mine too. I want to talk about the music.

You see there’s a perception about Xiu Xiu that bothers me. People paint it as hard, for Xiu Xiu fans only, or as something that should be appreciated primarily on a philosophical level. Yes, the early albums were angular and biting. The music itself was more avant guarde, difficult to access and carrying a difficult message. But there was a seed there that’s grown into something very different.

The message has remained true, as has the craftsmanship and writing of the music, but there has been an evolution to a beautiful and rich sound wrapping the thoughtful message. Where before there was appreciation now there is love. Sometime around The Air Force a shift began and any fear of sounding too pop disappeared. The lingering gaps remained as did the sharp angles, but they served as accents to melodic times; punctuation to the ideas presented in the lyrics.

After The Air Force came Women As Lovers, well deserved on any best-of the 00′s lists and a true breakout album. The cover was uncomfortable yet beautiful, a testament to the design skill of Joe Stewart. I remember listening to the advance for the first time, almost nervous after seeing the art options. The first track, ‘I do what I want when I want,’ immediately signals a change. It’s bright, rich, and full of sound. The words challenge the music, revolving around lust versus love, truth versus desire, and elements of safety mixed with BDSM. The record continues on in fashion, simultaneously soothing and challenging — driven by the emotion and beauty of the music.

Here’s my larger point: Xiu Xiu will challenge you and force you to look inside yourself, but you’re also going to get lost in the music. It’s passionate, it’s energetic, it moves and can move you. Go get the music however you can. Listen to it, please. You might not love it all, but I think it’s clearly recognizable as art, as important, and as something that needs to be made.

So ask me why I do this and my answer is Xiu Xiu.